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Saturday, December 17, 2011

Updates. . . .

Wow. . . .it's been a while. I'm sitting here with Jordan in one arm while typing with the other. And he's seriously just staring at my free hand moving around in an uneven manner so as to accommodate this post. Definitely multi-tasking at it's best. Anyways, so much has happened since my last post. Jordan is now two and a half months and is quite literally kicking me in the butt and gut. Maybe this was more so up until two weeks ago. That was when fall semester came to a close. And can I just say how relieved I am?? I gave birth to Jordan on October 5th. Right smack in the middle of the semester. I have no idea what I was thinking when I registered for this past semester being in the last stretch of my pregnancy. But I did. And I'm so happy that I made it through with some kind of sanity still left in me. I think?? I did, however, get my first 'B.' Ugh. . . .but considering my circumstances, I have to say that I was pretty grateful for it. I missed an exam and two quizes in this class due to my giving birth so pulling a 'B' in it was quite a humbling experience & one that I do not fail to recognize had the Lord's hand in it all the way. My accumulative GPA right now is at a 3.53. Definitely room for improvement. I hope to get it up this next semester. My girls got straight A's in their first term. All of them!! Woohoo!! They seriously make me so proud. They care so much about their schooling and their future. We're always talking about the different possibilities that lies in wake for them. It's so exciting to think about, let alone discuss it with them. They're eagerness to prepare themselves for what lies ahead is what keeps me pushing forward in my schooling. They are my main inspiration!! That & definitely the way my husband works. His hard work always leaves me speechless because he doesn't complain about it. He just goes out there everyday and does it. I love him so much.

The girls' 4.0 recognition

Well, the girls' straight A's came with a couple of perks this time around. Their ATOP dance group has been doing a 'School Is Cool' promotion where students receive a couple of months free tuition if they get a 4.0. I definitely used this to my advantage because my girls absolutely LOVE learning about their polynesian culture through the art of dance. And with four girls?? Tuition can be pretty pricey. So I used this as an extra motivational tool for them to keep their eyes on the prize and stay focused on their education. I told them that they would have to pay for their own tuition in ATOP by getting straight A's. Lote gave us a little bit of a scare because when I logged into their account online to check their progress with grades, she had all A's and one 'D.' I went and saw her teacher and found out that Lote hadn't been doing her writing assignments. Aaliyah had this same 4th grade teacher last year so I was accustomed to the kind of work both in school and out of school that these kids were expected to accomplish. We were still three weeks from report card time so he gave Lote two weeks to turn in 25 pages of writing. Lesson learned for my nine year old in that plague that continues to haunt the best of us: procrastination. She was able to complete all her writing logs in a week and a half and turned that 'D' into a rightful 'A.' :D As proud as I was of her for being accountable for this, I had to be tough on her and told her that she wouldn't have encountered this dilemma if she would've been doing what she was supposed to be doing. I told her that she absolutely deserved that 'D' for her carelessness in not doing her writing logs daily. She was miserable for that week and a half that she had to constantly come up with something new to write about. As much as I felt for her, I also explained to her that in the real world, like perhaps when she reaches college, she won't have teachers that'll be so forgiving as Mr. Guymon (her 4th grade teacher). She tiredly nodded her head and went to bed. She was so weary.

I, as well, had been super weary during finals time. Being a mom doesn't give me much time to study so when I'm in class, I soak everything up like a sponge. I make sure I never miss class because I know that don't have much time out of class to catch up especially since I always feel like I'm barely keeping up. This has been my advantage since going back to school. Attendance has become my #1 priority in keeping my grades up. I was able to pull a 95% on my finals and I was also overjoyed that I got A's in all my essays/papers I had to write up this semester. My financial aide suspension has been lifted so I'm all set for spring. Woohoo!! This last semester we had to pay $2500 towards my tuition. Trust that it has been a struggle these past couple of months. I don't know how my husband pulled it off having only worked three and a half months this year, but he did. That's how important my education is to him. It's all the support I need to go out there and give it my all. I love him so much.

This past week, the girls had their first dance recital. I've been so excited for it for the past week or so. They did such a great job all thanks to the best dance instructors in the valley. We were some proud parents. They danced their little hearts out. We love them so much for giving it their all. They were so nervous. My little Sila especially. Lol. But they all did a great job and we're so looking forward to their next quarter that starts next month with the island of TONGA!! Cheehoo!! :D It's a definite bonus that they also get to dance with so many of their cousins. It just makes it so much more funner for them and us cause we get to see our families that we don't get to see that often and that's always a good thing. :D

Aaliyah's intermediate group

My sister, baby Jordan & I front & center

The girls w/Taeao & grandma Polu

Tasha was picked to do the solo right before they performed!! We were so PROUD!!




Inseparable

Proud moment w/my Aaliyah

Our beautiful girls :D


Beautiful first cousins

We love our families for all their support



Proud dad & uncles

School's out 'til the end of the year and I've been doing nothing, but enjoying every min/sec that I don't have to think about assignments being due, papers to write up, exams to study for, etc. . . . .Instead, I get to indulge in my LOVE for reading and have already read four books total from cover to cover thanks to my sis inlaw, Taeao, whose mother in-law has a HUGE collection of books and has let me borrow a few. Taeao recommended all four books that I got to take home and I love every single one of them. I couldn't put any of them down. One of the books she recommended was one called Eragon. It's the first book of a series of four. I tried to get book two from the library, but they're all out and there's a super long waiting list for it. I asked Taeao if they had book two and she said she would check and get back to me, but my impatience has gotten the best of me and I ended up at Walmart yesterday with Hoko to get book two, The Eldest, of this series.




I also picked up The Girl With The Dragon Tatoo so I can read it before I watch the movie. The books are always better, I think. There's always so much more details in them. I haven't gotten too far into this book because life here at home has been busy. I feel like all I do is clean, clean, clean. And I'm not complaining. I'm actually grateful to have the time to do it cause this last semester left us with a disgustingly DIRTY and UNHEALTHY home. It didn't help that I was staying with my parents on and off so my mom could watch my boys. But we survived it and it's given me a whole new perspective on time. How much of it we have and don't have. The one thing you can never get back. Once it's past, it's in the past. So I pretty much have a whole new outlook and almost a quiet reverence for it. It's that much more precious to me. With that being said, it's a little after 5 a.m. and I have no idea why I'm still up. I should be sleeping since Jordan's asleep. But I figure, I'll have all the time in the world for sleep in twenty years or so when the kids are all out of the house and married with their own families. I'll try to remember this on days when I feel like a duck running around with its head cut off cause it's in those moments that I tell myself that this too, shall pass. :D With that said, I'm signing off.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

11 Years Strong!!



Today marks the eleventh year of being married to my best friend in the whole wide world. Nobody else has accompanied me or even taken me by hand to hell and back than this person has. Nobody else has been my #1 supporter in all my crazy endeavors that I'm always pursuing. Nobody else has the patience to put up with my countless mood swings & outrageous workout routines . Nobody else has the courage to tell me what I need to hear and not just what I want to hear. Nobody else has been supporting me financially for the past eleven years. Nobody else has been the father to my seven blessings. Nobody else has made it possible for me to have an eternal family by taking me to the most important place on this earth. Nobody else has pushed me past my limits and showed me that life is limitless. Nobody else is pulling for me more than anyone (my #1 cheerleader). Nobody else snores louder in my house. Nobody else is up with me at all hours of the night with an infant baby & then chooses to do it of his own free will six more times after that. Nobody else, but HIM. Happy Anniversary babe!! I love you so much.









Monday, October 24, 2011

Overwhelmed

I love him so much!! It's always been ME & YOU!!

I've been feeling overwhelmed lately. And it's not a bad thing so much as it's just tiring. We've welcomed baby Jordan into our world and I'm so glad that Hoko's been home since the day I brought him out of the NICU. Hoko's been amazing, to say the least. He gets up for Jordan's feedings when I'm just exhausted. He rubs my back while I'm feeding Jordan just to let me know he's here with me. He's been making dinner for the kids that's literally 'to die for' cause this MAN can COOK!! :D We've been running errands together cause it's been a while since he's been home this long. And with E.R., you never know how long til they're sent out again. At this very moment he's at home with our boys while I'm here at school blogging and catching up on my school work. I have THEE best professors here at WSU. They've been so understanding to my situation and are working with me in giving me the extra time I've needed in order to get caught up. In only one class alone, I had six papers due. I was able to complete four of them today and will work on finishing up the other two tomorrow.

Life has been pretty busy since Hoko's been home. We've indulged in spending time with our families because they mean so much to us. Hoko's been making very good use of his time while being home as well. Last week he went and sat for his GED. Woo hoo!! It's been over ten years since this guy's been outta school. So believe me when I say that I am EXTREMELY proud of him. Education wasn't really something that he got support in growing up. So he's always pushed getting his GED on the back burner due to his fear of failing. Well, I'm so glad he's sucked it up and checked this off his list of 'things to do before he dies' list. Lol. We also had the opportunity to drive out to Vernal for an interview Hoko had with a company he's been trying to get in to for a couple of months now. It was a beautiful drive. I still get awe struck of how absolutely GORGEOUS it is to live here in Utah where we get to experience all four seasons. And since it's fall right now, the colors of the leaves are stunning!! :D The drive took about four hours to get there so it was pretty much an all day thing. He got the call back last Friday with a job offer to start on the 14th of Nov. As exciting as it's been to have received such a blessing, it's also been a little scary. Hoko's been with E.R. for the past 3-4 years and they've been really good to us. Hoko was saying that working for them really helped him to grow up a lot faster. Being away from us and not having anyone around gave him a lot to think about while he was away. And for that, I will always be grateful for the time he was there that we were able to grow through our experiences together. And come to think of it, it did the same for me. Cause it's always such a big adjustment having to hold down the fort at home on my own and then transitioning back to a two parent household when he's back. The mini vacay trips were also a bonus whenever I'd get the chance to go out and visit him. :D

I guess the feeling of being overwhelmed aren't the only ones that are surfacing. I'm also holding on to the hope that we're ready for these major changes in our lives that we're experiencing right now. I'm definitely EXCITED that Hoko will only be gone for two weeks at a time with this new job. Then he's able to come home for a WHOLE week. Woohoo!! What's not exciting about that?? :D I'm also looking forward to the stability that this new job holds for our family as well. He'll be working year round AND we get benefits!! Another bonus. It's been so long since we've been able to enjoy the security that company benefits hold for it's employees and their families. But I can definitely get used to that. :D We've been tremendously blessed and I'm so thankful to a loving father in heaven that is constantly mindful of our growing family. These upcoming changes are going to be for the best and I anxiously welcome them with open arms. Our kids are getting older and I will always count my blessings that we're able to support them not just financially, but spiritually as well. With that said, I'm signing off. I started this post earlier at school, but am finishing it off a little after 6 am the next day. :D

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Baby #7 Is Here. . . . .

I had my doctor's appointment on Tuesday with intensions of setting a date for induction. I felt calm and less anxious in that appointment. My doctor and I decided on Wed, the next day. I was instructed to report to labor and delivery by 9 am. I went home and started to clean up around the house. That lasted for a good half hour. Lol. I wasn't feelin' it so I headed out the door to Babies 'R Us to grab some stuff for our bundle of joy since I always like to wait last minute before grabbing anything. I had his car seat and stroller that I got off of KSL. My favorite place for everything!! :D And that was pretty much it. So I grabbed him some blankets, bottles, clothes, a Halloween costume (lol), and socks. I drove straight to Salt Lake to pick up my mom and my two boys. Mom was coming to spend the week at my house to take care of the kids while I was in the hospital. So grateful to her for being so GREAT!! My two sis inlaws, Fine & Sheena, were heading up here in the morning to be with me in the hospital.

I was there by 9 am. They got me started on my IV's. We sat around talking and laughing. The first two hours passed and they checked me and I still hadn't dilated much. Another 2-3 hours went by and still nothing. It was four o'clock and my nurse said she'd empty my bladder cause sometimes that helps to move things along. Sure enough, as gross as this sounds, my bladder was totally full and when they emptied it out I dilated to an eight by 4:30 and by 4:45 I could feel him coming. The nurse ran out into the hallway and yelled for them to call my doctor to come while I was doing everything in my power to NOT push, but I could feel him coming. Next thing I know, my doctor walks in and two pushes later. . . .baby #7 came a kicking and a screaming. He arrived at 4:54 pm. 7lbs 12oz and 21 inches long. I was shocked at how small he was. I know that's an average size baby, but after giving birth to Savou?? I was so SURPRISED!! I kept saying, "He's so tiny." Lol. But he is BEAUTIFUL!! :D And he is OURS. :D

When they placed him on my chest, I was overwhelmed with joy. And at the same time I was overcome with sorrow because Hoko wasn't there. I did everything in my power to prepare myself for this day, but when they placed our son in my arms, I fell apart and cried. The tears kept falling as I held my baby boy in my arms so grateful for his precious spirit, but so sad that Hoko wasn't there to greet him and share in that special moment. :(

I had some complications after delivery and it took a while to get me into my own room. I was transferred a little after six. All my in-laws had arrived by this time. They all took turns holding baby. By about 7 pm, the nurse came in to give him a bath. His temperature dropped a little afterwards so he was placed underneath a warmer. Then we started to notice that he was breathing fast. She called the charge nurse in to check him and the CN immediately took him to the nursery. From there he was taken to transition where they monitored him, poked him (tears), and kept him under close watch to see if he would get any better. He was having a hard time breathing on his own. They transferred him to the NICU and kept him there. I was terrified!! Every parent's nightmare. And while this was happening with him, I had the whole floor of nurses in my room with me because I was hemorrhaging and they couldn't get me to stop. They finally got my blood under control at about ten o'clock. Some of my in-laws went to be with baby and I started to freak out while I was hemorrhaging and started getting really light headed and nauseous as my eyes started to roll back. The nurses started getting me to keep talking by asking me questions. I stayed with them cause all I kept thinking about was how much I had to stay conscious so I'd know what was happening with my son. They got me under control and now all I was worried about was my poor son.

I wasn't able to go be with him because of the state I was in. I'm so grateful for our families that were with me throughout the night. They stayed with me while others went to stay with the baby. My last visitor left after midnight and my nurse rolled me in a wheelchair to go be with my son. He was in an incubator with IV's hooked up to him, monitors on his body and his oxygen circulating through his nose. As grateful as I am for all the medical technology that was keeping my son alive, I was crushed to see him so helpless and fighting for his life. I sat there and watched him til 2:30 am when they close the NICU to all visitors while they do reports and shift changes so I headed back to my room and laid there in the dark. I kept trying to get some sleep so that I could be rested enough to return to him, but sleep had evaded me. By 4 am I broke down and had a much needed cry. I said a silent prayer to my father in heaven thanking him for blessing me with this beautiful baby boy. I prayed that all would be well and that we would both heal from our afflictions and return home to our family. I never MISSED Hoko so much in my life as did that night. I finally dozed off and got a good hour and a half of sleep before getting up and heading straight back to the NICU.

It was a rough day, but I'm happy to report that things have gotten a lot better. I was given a blood transfusion Friday night before getting discharged and I feel so much better. My ward sent two priesthood holders to give my son and I a blessing. A member of the Relief Society presidency also came to check on me and render any needed services for our family. I love my ward so much. They are so mindful of every family member in the ward it leaves me breathless. Baby Tevita Jordan is recovering and getting better everyday and I look forward to the day that we'll be able to bring him home so he can meet his brothers and sisters. And also his dad. :D Hoko's not back yet, but he'll be home in a couple of days. :D It's been quite the roller coaster ride, but Im thankful for all that we've been blessed with. Especially our wonderful FAMILIES and FRIENDS. :D



Tuesday, October 4, 2011

39 Weeks

I've been dilated to a two for going on three weeks now. It's crazy cause I usually dilate fast, but I guess not this time. I'm 39 weeks as of yesterday and if it weren't for my doctor's appointment scheduled in an hour, I would be pretty down. But I've been amazingly patient with this pregnancy and I know it has everything to do with Hoko not being here for this one. I've been back and forth about wanting him here so badly for the birth of our son while at the same time hoping that he's scheduled to start another project soon. We've both been quietly stressing about his current project coming to an end this week. The money we had put away for when he comes home to wait for another project to start up was spent yesterday to pay for all my outstanding warrants (see previous post) and has really been weighing heavily on us.

I woke up this morning at around 7 am and found that it was still dark out. Which means that winter is quickly approaching, as it always does. I love this time of year here in Utah. But with six, soon to be seven, kids in tow, that means jackets, snow boots, gloves, scarves and more socks are what's needed. And we haven't even gotten halloween costumes on top of all that. But I have a constant prayer in my heart that all will be well and that are needs will be met because my father in heaven has never let me down. The whole conference weekend, I kept having that scripture in my head about how the Lord takes care of the lilies in the field. How they grow without any effort, then why wouldn't he take care of us? His children that he loves and adores so much. I don't remember what scripture it is or if I got it from a talk, but it was a constant reminder to me of the principle of faith. How I need to increase my faith in the Lord and if I'm making sure that my family and I are doing everything in our power to live righteously and provide for ourselves and those around us, we will be blessed and taken care of. We will never go without. Our needs will always be met. There's definitely comfort in knowing that.

I'm so excited to be welcoming our baby #7 into the world. I can't wait to see how you look, your personality and sweet spirit that I get to enjoy nurturing. I love being your mother and you're not even here yet. Nothing can top that role in my life. I love you baby #7!! I don't know what your name is going to be yet. Grandma Selu has the honor of naming you so it's going to be a special one. I think daddy and I will throw in a middle name so that we can have somewhat of a part in your name. We're so happy that Heavenly Father is trusting us with your sweet little spirit. Our only hope is that we're able to fulfill our obligations in loving and raising you up to be a worthy priesthood holder in this not so easy world. My love for you will never waver as I know yours won't for me or your dad or your brothers and sisters that are waiting on this side of the veil to greet you. :D I love you :D

Monday, October 3, 2011

Ups, Downs & In-betweens. . . . .

This past weekend was amazing. I enjoyed the conference talks so much. I am definitely looking forward to next month's Ensign so I can go through all the talks once more cause I know that there's no way I got everything that was shared. I spent the weekend with my parents savoring every moment with these two people that gave me life. I am so thankful to have them so close. They fill a void in me that no one else can with Hoko working out of state. We ate such great home cooked meals that were prepared by my mom. And I do not take those things for granted especially since I haven't been able to do any of that with this pregnancy.

I noticed something today, tho. As I was reading through my daily updates on facebook, I was amazed at how many of my friends and family were experiencing such a hard day today. So many were filled with stress about different things going on in their lives. And even for me. . . . .I found myself trying EXTRA hard to be optimistic because of some things that happened today that weren't planned, but there seemed to be no way around it. And I thought to myself, WOW!! Satan is putting in some serious work for so many of my friends & families to be going through so much distress in their lives after such a great & uplifting weekend. And even ME. Different things from my past keep slowly surfacing & catching up with me. Today?? It was all my outstanding warrants from tickets that I let accumulate & add up. I took care of all FOUR of them today. Can you believe it?? Four outstanding warrants. The only thing standing between me & jail was this blessing I've been carrying around inside me for the past nine months. Had it not been for him, I would be sitting in a jail cell hoping to post bail for being irresponsible on my part & letting myself get caught up in the dilemma that I found myself in. These tickets are years old. Some dating back to when we only had three kids. We're now going on number seven. Ridiculous, right?? I know. SMH. . . . .so what suddenly brought on this sense of urgency in getting these things taken care of?? The fact that as we were driving home Thursday night after taking the girls to their dance practice & spending dinner at my mom's, I almost had a heart attack when I saw the flashing lights through my rear view mirror & it wasn't to pass me up. It was for me to pull over to the side of the freeway. I was terrified because I already knew about my tickets that I never took care of. He ran my info & came back asking me if I wanted to step out of the car so the kids wouldn't hear. I quickly obliged. He showed me my warrants & echoed my fears that if it weren't for me being so pregnant, he would be hauling me to jail. He let me off on a warning, which I am so grateful for, with a promise that I would get it taken care of.

As I was driving home with the kids, I felt so disappointed in myself. Disappointed that I almost ended up in jail because of my negligence in keeping the laws of the land. What kind of example am I setting for my kids?? What would've happened if I went to jail that night?? Hoko's not even in the same state as us right now. Am I seriously that selfish that I can place that kind of responsibility on my parents?? Cause I know they would've come & gotten the kids as well as did everything they could to get me out of jail. Yet, I have enough money sitting in my bank account to pay off these things & make things right with the law?? This was sounding more & more pathetic as all these thoughts were circulating in my head. I couldn't believe that I let it come to this. I made the decision that night that I would take care of all my tickets on Monday so I could re-instate my drivers license & not put my children in jeopardy ever again. I'm happy to report that I made all those payments today & have no outstanding warrants in my name anymore & I plan to keep it that way. Although, I have to wait til next week to re-instate my license due to one of my tickets being so old that it went to the state's collection department & they only update weekly, I have to say how grateful I am to my Heavenly Father for putting me in a position that I could take care of this matter. I won't even lie, tho. Hoko & I struggled with this all weekend long & even all day today because we had other plans for that money, but by the end of the day. . . .we were counting our blessings that we were in a position to get this ordeal taken care of.

Our beautiful blessings. They seriously make us who we are today. :D

Hoko gets home this Saturday & I can't wait to see him. It's always so hard being apart, but I must say that I'm even more excited that he'll be here to meet the brand new member of our family since I'll be getting induced this week. :D And while it's bitter sweet having him home for an uncertain amount of time, I'll hold steadfast to my faith in the Lord that he is mindful of my growing family & our needs & that we will be blessed with our needs being met, as they always are. In these tough economic times, I count my blessings that Hoko has a job. While it takes him out of state & far away from us, it provides for our financial well being while I am in school in pursuit of a career that will also help out & bring him home. I love him so much & am in awe of the kinds of sacrifices he continues to make for our family.


My husband. I will never be able to make the kinds of sacrifices he makes for our family. I love him!!

And while this weekend had it's ups, downs & in-betweens. . . .I'm hoping that we passed the test & can fully move forward with no regrets. :D

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Nothing Can Compare To A Mother's Love


This is a true story of Mother’s Sacrifice during the Japan Earthquake.
After the Earthquake had subsided, when the rescuers reached the ruins of a young woman’s house, they saw her dead body through the cracks. But her pose was somehow strange that she knelt on her knees like a person was worshiping; her body was leaning forward, and her two hands were supporting by an object. The collapsed house had crashed her back and her head.

With so many difficulties, the leader of the rescuer team put his hand through a narrow gap on the wall to reach the woman’s body. He was hoping that this woman could be still alive. However, the cold and stiff body told him that she had passed away for sure.
He and the rest of the team left this house and were going to search the next collapsed building. For some reasons, the team leader was driven by a compelling force to go back to the ruin house of the dead woman. Again, he knelt down and used his had through the narrow cracks to search the little space under the dead body. Suddenly, he screamed with excitement,” A child! There is a child! “
The whole team worked together; carefully they removed the piles of ruined objects around the dead woman. There was a 3 months old little boy wrapped in a flowery blanket under his mother’s dead body. Obviously, the woman had made an ultimate sacrifice for saving her son. When her house was falling, she used her body to make a cover to protect her son. The little boy was still sleeping peacefully when the team leader picked him up.
The medical doctor came quickly to exam the little boy. After he opened the blanket, he saw a cell phone inside the blanket. There was a text message on the screen. It said,” If you can survive, you must remember that I love you.” This cell phone was passing around from one hand to another. Every body that read the message wept. ” If you can survive, you must remember that I
love you.” Such is the mother’s love for her child!!

This story is amazing and touches my heart in so many ways. It truly is a depiction of how much we, as mothers, love our children. Nothing compares to our love for our kids. I know without a doubt that I would've been in the same position if it were me in this earthquake with my 3 month old baby. I know no mother that wouldn't sacrifice their all in the protection of their child. They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but this one. . . . .left me speechless & filled with a thousand different emotions.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Been To Hell Lately??


That's exactly where I felt like I've been residing for the past week. :( I started feeling the first signs of the flu bug on Monday & it hit me with a TON of bricks. It was terrible, to say the least. I kept hoping & praying that with every passing day I would start to feel better, but to no avail. I was already scheduled to see my doctor Wed morning & felt relief in the thought alone, but not in actually having to drag myself out of bed & get there. But I did. He checked me over, listened to baby's heart, measured me, did my vitals & listened to my lungs. After asking me about my symptoms, he concluded that I had the flu bug & because I was pregnant I would have it for five more days. He gave me a prescription for a z-pack, told me to take some tylenol, go home & rest. I did exactly that. I kept feeling so much better whenever I'd take my tylenol & hopelessly held on to the notion that maybe I'm getting better so I'd get up & do a load of laundry or go to my morning class @ school. But every time after doing so, I'd find myself barely making it to my bed as my head would hit the pillow & I would TRY to go to sleep even though my body was aching, burning, then shaking from the chills on & off the whole time. I was miserable. And on top of all that?? I keep getting what they call 'false alarms' (fake contractions) which I usually don't care about cause they're not that bad, but to have them all night was an absolute nightmare. :(

I barely felt good enough to pick the girls up from school Thu so we could head straight to their ATOP dance practice so we spent the night at my parents & the next morning I had to call & excuse the girls from school cause there was no way I was in any shape to make that drive back to Ogden. I had the WORST of the chills, burning fever, sweating, body aches on Friday afternoon & had to wait til 4 pm to take my tylenol, but as soon as I did, it started to even out my body temperature & even got my body aches under control. I had to run an errand with my dad & I knew that would've been the only time I would be able to do it so I hurried & got up & left with him. When we got back, I still felt a little better, but I was already anticipating the routine of misery to start up again. So I just waited. I got a call from my sis in-law, Fine. She called to check up on me cause she's so AWESOME & SWEET!! I talked to her for a while & felt fine the whole time. :D Then Hoko called & I ended my convo with Fine. But I wasn't able to stay on the phone long with Hoko before my eyelids started feeling heavy & I knew I needed to get to bed. So we said our "I love you's" & "Goodbye's" & I was off to bed. Thank goodness for GREAT parents whom I love & adore so much. I don't know how I would've survived this whole ordeal without them. They cooked, cleaned & looked after me & my children. My dad said he was going to take me to the ER if I didn't start to get better by Friday night, but since things seemed to be turning up in our favor, I received a priesthood blessing from my dad & my brother instead. And quickly dozed off. I was so grateful when Saturday morning came & I still felt better. Extremely tired, but definitely better. My parents got up early & left to my nephew, Gemini's, football game with my four girls. The two boys stayed with me cause they're still a little sick & I didn't want them to get worse. This change in the weather is so heavenly, but I didn't have any warm clothes for them & I'm not taking any chances on them with what I just went through.

Because I was feeling so much better, I took the boys out for a drive. It felt so good. :D I even met up with Fine & Sheena to go support Hoko's nephew, Ti Tonga's, bake sale. We bought cookies & cupcakes & were grateful for the sweet treats on the drive back to Fine's. I headed back to my parents, packed up our stuff in the van & headed to Sheena's to watch the Utah/BYU game. It was a full house cause Manase & Polu were there & Fine & her family came over as well. But it was so much fun. We laughed all night at Manase 'funny' jokes!! Lol. He's such a fob!! LMBO!! But they're the best!! They bought us chinese which just made my night since I hadn't really eaten anything since Thu night. Polu got my two older girls these really cute shirts from Park City that she brought for them. It was an all around great night with great people. We came home famished & everyone walked straight to their beds & knocked out. It's the simplicity in those kinds of family gatherings that always gets me. Only thing missing was Hoko. He was watching the game at the same time & could hear all the laughter in the background & I felt so bad for him. :( He said how he wished he was with us, but we both have an unspoken understanding of knowing that he's exactly where he's supposed to be even though it may not be where we want him to be. And with that. . . .I'm signing off. Gotta start on some homework. I'm back my trip to hell was very temporary. I don't wanna visit that place ever again. :D

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Sacrifices. . . .

We've been making a lot of sacrifices lately in order to continue on this journey that we're on in getting ourselves to where we need to be. One of them being that our two youngest boys spend three to four nights a week with my parents because I have school. We originally planned that I would enroll them in the daycare here at Weber, but when I went to do so, they were FULL. :( Some weeks are better than others & on the ones that aren't so good, we spend the week commuting back & forth from Salt Lake to Ogden just so we can be together with our boys as much as we can. It's bad enough that Hoko works out of state, but to have to be away from ME, too. That just kills me. We spent the weekend at my parents place & headed back home Sunday night. I brought the boys home with me & then took them back Monday & spent a couple of hours with them there before heading back to Ogden to pick up the girls from school. So they've been there since Monday & have been asking my mom when they'll be coming back home to me since yesterday. :( I talk to them everyday & can't wait to pick them up tomorrow. I love them so much & am so EXCITED for them to welcome a new member to their club of boys/brothers. :D


Our two handsome boys!! Soon to be THREE!! :D


This past week, I've been feeling under the weather. I knew immediately that I was coming down with the flu. I just kept hoping & praying that it wouldn't get as bad as it has been the past couple of times that I've gotten it. And I honestly thought that it was, but am so grateful that I've actually been starting to feel better today. I had my doctor's appt this morning to see how everything's coming along. I've now reached 36 weeks & am anxious for our son's arrival. :D I'm still dilated to a two, but my doctor said that he's moved down a lot so that's a good sign. I can't wait for him to make his debut. And even though I really wanted another girl, I know we're getting what we're supposed to be getting & I'm so thankful. Hoko's even more excited!! He's been saying it was another boy from the get go. And I guess it's a good thing. Evens out the playing field in our home. A little. Lol.

I have my first exam next week in one of my classes & am relieved that this bug isn't sticking around long. My professor's holding study sessions during the weekend & I plan to attend. It's been kinda crazy since the semester started cause it's so packed on campus. I'm not used to that cause it wasn't like that when I started in the spring & then summer was even more empty. But I know that as soon as I have baby, everything will work out. Not being limited physically makes a big difference. And oh how I'm looking forward to putting my Vibram's to use once I give birth. They're my new running/fitness shoes. My sister inlaw, Taeao, has had a pair for over a year now & I've always wanted one cause they are so lightweight. Well, I finally got my pair & have already started to break 'em in. :D


My new Vibram's that I'm in love with :D

But I am constantly amazed at how much strength I draw from my kids. I can only imagine if I wasn't a parent yet. I wouldn't have a BIGGER reason for pushing myself more. I don't think 'I' would be enough of a motivation to do more. But kids are so innocent. They bring out the best in us in just their pure innocence & love for the simple things in life. It never ceases to amaze me how much they can just enjoy playing made up games with each other & find the most joy in those things. :D


Our six blessings @ stake conference two Sundays ago :D


We've made the decision for baby #7 to be our last one. My health hasn't been doing so well with the more pregnancies it endures. And I honestly feel that we've been abundantly blessed. It's time now to focus on our future with all seven children that we've brought into this world & especially ZONE in on how we're gonna be supporting them. Lol. I love my life & can't imagine it any other way. Even with the trials & tribulations that we've gone through. . . . .they've seriously only made us stronger & able to progress further in our lives.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Savou Turns TWO!! :D

Savou turned TWO last month on the 12th of August, but we waited for Hoko to come on his home visit this past Labor Day weekend to celebrate it. Hoko & I had already planned to get a boat rental for our family before we decided to hold Savou's lil bday party so it all worked out perfect. I've talked about how much we've enjoyed going to Pineview Reservoir this past summer so it comes to no surprise that that's where we ended up for this occassion. :D This lake is such a beautiful lake. There have been a couple of tragic deaths there over the past month or so that would probably give some a scare regarding it, but this lake is seriously so breathtakingly beautiful & safe. You just have to make sure you abide by all the safety rules that are set in order to keep us all out of harms way.

Anyways, we bbq'ed chicken, ribs, steaks, mango berry salad (courtesy of Zupas), 4 dozen chocolate covered strawberries (courtesy of Tina Reid of cHeat dAy), tiramisu bday cake, fruit bday tart, drinks galore, FAT BOI'S (courtesy of Jim & Dode), oysters, corn & more, but I can't remember. Lol. There was a TON of food & we had such a GREAT time with our families.

Besides the minor setback with the rope getting stuck in the propellor, everything went smoothly. Sorry to those that didn't get a ride on the boat. :( But we'll definitely be planning another boating trip with the family. And soon. :D

We rented one of those tubes that we had tied to the back of the boat & you'd think Hoko would be considerate of the kids & the fact that they're just KIDS. But NO. . . . .this guy totally FLOORED it & they went flying all over the place. Hahahahaha!! They had such a BLAST & we can't wait to do it again. It was so much fun & the weather was PERFECT for such an occasion. We all left feeling so much joy & love towards one another & really cherishing the fact that families are forever & they're what REALLY matter. I love all of our families for all their continuous support in our different endeavors that we're all pursuing. I don't take for granted the love we share with each other no matter what our weaknesses/differences may be. :D I had to create a slideshow for the BAZILLION pictures I took. Lol. :D Enjoy!! :D

Thursday, September 8, 2011

I MISS YOU



I dropped Hoko to the airport Tuesday morning & he's all I've been thinking about since. I had to forcefully push him outta my mind for a couple of hours that day so I could get my homework done. We had such a great holiday weekend that he was able to fly in for & I did NOT want it to end. While I was laying in his arms the night before he left, I couldn't hold my tears back & Hoko could feel them running down his arm & he pulled me in closer. With all the tragedies that have been going on lately, the thought that kept creeping into my mind were what if something happened to me when I'm in labor with the baby? What if I don't recover & for some reason complications surface & my life is cut short? I'm not afraid to die. But to die so young? I understand that we're all gonna go through this process in our lives sooner or later, but I kept thinking of Hoko & the kids. All these things were running through my mind & I found myself wondering if this 'being apart' thing was really worth it or if we needed to seriously re-assess our goals for our future. I prayed for guidance & comfort. I didn't want to be making decisions based on fear. It wasn't too long before Savou came trotting into our room with his only care in the world being that he needed help climbing up onto our bed & for Hoko to get his arm off of me & go sleep in his (Savou's) room. Lol. That put a smile on my face & I quickly fell asleep.

When we got up the next morning to head out the door & take Hoko to the airport, I felt reassured that for the time being, we were doing exactly what we are supposed to be doing. Nevertheless, it was the shortest drive of my life, mind you, we do live a good 30-40 min from the airport. But I dreaded every exit & city we passed by that brought us closer & closer to our destination. :( When he got out, we took a quick pix, he gave the boys a kiss cause the girls weren't able to come cause they had school, & then he was off. But while we embraced before he left, it hit me that he was returning to South Carolina by himself. He no longer had Norman with him & I felt even more sad. I told him so & he immediately agreed & was a little down, but we kissed & he was off. I was busy running around all day, but I really needed to spend some time with someone that knew how I felt so I can just share my sorrows with. I text my sis in-law, Sheena, to see if she was available to meet up for breakfast before I headed back to Ogden. Thank goodness she was. :D I felt comforted by being able to just talk about it, amongst other things that we go through as wives with husbands that work out of state for months at a time.

Savou giving his dad kisses in his sleep
Not too happy about his dad leaving. . .

Awww. . . .I miss him :(

By the time I headed back to Ogden, it was time for me to pick up Sila from school & take her to her audiology appointment. I quietly prayed that everything would work out & that Sila's hearing had improved. Last year around this time, she saw the audiologist & was diagnosed with being borderline moderate to severe hearing loss. Well, I'm happy to report that she's grown out of it & her hearing is back to normal. :D YAY!! :D She's well into her kindergarten year & loves it!! I called the office yesterday morning to excuse her from school because she has a really bad cough, along with her older sister, Lote, & the office secretary was saying, awww. . .my granddaughter's gonna be so sad cause she's in Sila's class & loves her. :D Sila is friends with EVERYONE!! She is such a social butterfly & it worried me a little before, but her teacher says it hasn't been a problem. She doesn't talk when she's not supposed to & is very polite. PHEW. . . . .




We're back to our regular routine of school, doctor's appointments, church, dance practices, potty training & so on. . . . .I miss Hoko more & more everyday, but I honestly believe that distance truly does make the heart grow fonder. I cherish EVERY min/sec when Hoko's home with us on his brief visits & am more patient & able to see his good traits over the annoying ones. Most of the time, at least. Lol. I love him for all that he is!! I don't take for granted anymore the silly little annoyances that used to be looked at underneath a microscope. Instead, I choose to revel in his love for me & ongoing strife to be better. Cause I'm far from perfect myself. I love him so much & hope & pray that my sons gain the hard work & humble nobility of this man. :D

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Happy Birthday MOM!! :D


We celebrated my mom's 58th birthday this past Friday.  I made reservations two weeks ago for us to have dinner with my parents at the Roof restaurant which is located at the top floor of the Joseph Smith building.  And WOW!!  Not only is the view breath taking, but the food??  Let me just take you on a little journey, if you will.  Imagine a place where it's buffet style, but you are absolutely FLOORED about what to get cause you wanna eat everything in sight, but there's not enough room on your plate for it, let alone enough room in your stomach to keep it all down.  It has everything you could imagine & more.  Cheeses, crackers, soups, fruits, meats, seafood, breads, rolls, cakes of all kinds, crepes, fruits salads and so much more.  Well, if you can imagine that than you can imagine what the Roof is like.  Everything was delicious!!  And so PRETTY!!  :D  The dessert table was HEAVENLY.  We were all so stuffed by the end of our dinner, it was so hard for us to move.  Lol.  So we just sat there for a while & talked about different things going on in our lives.  It was really nice & I soaked up every moment of being able to spend with my parents.




My mom has been such a strength to me in who I've become & what I continue to strive for daily.  She is such a giving person.  Especially when it comes to her kids & grandkids.  She LOVES having us over for no reason at all, but to just spend quality time together.  And more than that, she loves to play with the grandkids & to see them happy.  Just hearing them laugh makes her day.  I call my mom up almost daily just to talk to her about anything & everything & nothing at all, but to just see what she's doing.  I've learned so much from her & am so proud to be her daughter.  My kids absolutely adore her & continue to tell me that when they turn 18, they're moving in with her.  And I'm totally fine with that.  Hahahaha!!  We're always spending the weekend with my parents sleeping over in Salt Lake at their place when Hoko's gone.  It makes things not so depressing at home when I'm so involved in my school work that the kids are constantly asking when Hoko will be back.  Plus, I love being able to have someone I trust & know that I can share anything with wholeheartedly & it remains confidential.  That's what my mom's been for me.  Over the past month or two, I've been able to go to breakfast, just the two of us & even dinner on occasion.  It's been so relaxing & rejuvenating.  I assume every woman needs that ONE person in their lives that can fill the void of friendship outside of her marriage.  Maybe not all the time, but on occasion is always nice.  And it may not always work out that it's your own mom, but I'm happy to say that I have that & I'm so grateful.  I do not take that for granted.  :D  Happy Birthday Mom!!  May you live for many many more years & continue to be the person you are today.  I love you so much.  :D